We went to London a few days ago to meet up with friends and go to the theatre to see Jude Law in Hamlet. Almost missed seeing the show - in the ladies, a Jude-ey groupie became so hyper-ventilatingly excited at the thought of seeing him - and then nearly swooned with shock when someone else joked that they thought his understudy was doing that day's show instead - that I feared I would be stuck in the loo with a corpse blocking the door.

It made me wonder what's wrong with me. I've never been star-struck - of the fainting/hysterical screamy kind - or at least I haven't been since I was 16 and mad about The Sweet. If I saw someone famous sitting in the same restaurant as me, I would rather spend the entire evening staring at my shoes rather than be thought of as staring. I can no more imagine asking someone for their autograph than volunteering to go pot-holing. I even think that Brad Pitt isn't very attractive - in fact, I think he looks a bit like a hamster.

See? That's how wrong things are with me.

Though I have to admit I thought Jude Law was rather tasty an excellent actor...